#queuepid was wrong

[aromanticofficial]

official aromantic post

Cupid missed

[aromanticofficial]

I love being in a aroace4aroace relationship. Cuz we aren’t dating. We are just an old married couple who lovingly bullies each other for a living and sometimes we also cuddle. The one with the most shiny pokémon cards is the one allowed to watch the TV. Which is always me. I win

goals tbh

[aromanticofficial]

been feelinv very Aromantic recently and its nice to be able to go. yayyy im aro and thats just cool and awesome i feel happy in myself in that specific regard its nice :>

aro joy!!!! hell yeah!!!

[aromanticofficial]

HOW DO YOU TELL IF YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON SOMEONE, HOW DOES ROMANTIC FEELINGS DIFFERENTIATE FROM PLATONIC I THINK IM GONNA EXPLODE

i have felt both towards my boyfriend at different times so in my experience platonic attraction is a feeling that is much less anxious. before I got romantic feelings, I wanted to spend time with him and was a little disappointed when I couldn't, but that was about it. once I developed romantic attraction to him, I found myself attached to him like I wasn't before. I was anxious that if I said something he might reject me.

neither of these experiences are mutually exclusive of the other, but this is my experience.

[aromanticofficial]

average British "person"

(/joking)

[aromanticofficial]

I’m aroace and was just browsing the aroace tag when I came across a few exclusionist posts & now I’m feeling… idk. Weird, I guess.

Am I welcome on this blog, even though I’m also ace? I’ve been reblogging posts from here because I recently realized I was aro and wanted to engage with & explore that side of my identity, but if as many aro people as they indicated don’t want aroace people around in their aro spaces, would it be better to just… leave the aromantic tag and blogs altogether? I don’t want to take away from people who are aroallo. I’ve seen it done time and again and don’t want to be some kind of… invasive species or something.

(sorry this was so long and rambly.)

anon. I am holding your face so gently. you belong in aro spaces. don't let exclusionists tell you otherwise. your experience is unique and valuable and there is not a single romantic, sexual, or gender orientation that takes that away. I promise that every aro is welcome on aromanticofficial because this is a space for every aro on the arospec.

[aromanticofficial]

Ik being an aro adult can suck but as a high schooler im having the time of my life. my friends are panicking over crushes and im giggling and kicking my feet at fish facts and if anyone brings up dating I can just go “im too young” and it’s a valid answer.

hell yeah bro that's what it's all about

[aromanticofficial]

I'm so tired of people saying characters have no interest in romance then saying they're asexual. Aros exist please stop erasing us!

for real!

[aromanticofficial]

hii just sending some positivity if anyone needs it; about three years ago (mb 4 idk) me and another aro guy i met got an apartment together and its been great. no romance no pressure for romance nothing.

we’re not in a qpr we’re just friends who live together and neither of us are interested in being together or with anyone else and we’re very happy with our situation and its unlikely to ever change. several years ago i was hopeless thinking i could never be happy without romance but im the happiest ive ever been and im comfortable with who i am and where i am.

i could live my whole life like this and i wouldnt change w thing :) we’re happy and comfortable.

so uh. you guys can do it. its possible. you dont have to date anyone you dont need a qpr you can just be yourself. and sometimes it just kinda works out and three years later you realize you’re where you wanna be.

being aro to me is to be happy 💚 good luck everyone ily

some aro positivity for any and all who need something to be happy about

[aromanticofficial]

Is it just me or am I seeing more acephobia and arophobia on Tumblr again? Like I keep seeing all these jokes of "LOL no one on Tumblr knows what sex is" or making fun of things like "platonic soulmates" as some idea come up by shipper-hating puritans trying to erase queer people.

Maybe I'm just being paranoid, I remember being on Tumblr back in the seriously acephobic days and it left an impression.

Maybe I need to unfollow some mutuals.

you may need to unfollow some mutuals because I haven't seen anyone talking about an uptick in aro/acephobia

[aromanticofficial]

shocking news, The aroallo guy is here to talk abt being aroallo. everybody gasp

anyways. i wanted to explain why aroallos are so "sensitive" about our identity and place in the aspec community.

the aspec community has a sex negativity problem. this is obvious. the amount of "sex bad" takes that are boldly labelled "aspec experiences" instead of what they actually are (puritan culture) is enough to make anyone who actually experiences sexual attraction feel more than unwelcome in the aspec community.

aside from that, there's also the erasure. aromanticism is always treated as a subcategory of asexuality. there's this constant underline to every mainstream-ish discussion of aromanticism that basically comes down to the inherently aroallophobic idea that "not all aces are aro, but all aros are ace". it's not that anyone says this out loud; it's that everyone seems to imply it subtly, everyone seems to believe it without even thinking twice about it.

aside from that, there's the lack of representation. name an aromantic character. chances are, you've just named an aroace character. and even in the very very rare case of a character being canonically aromantic but not canonically asexual (e.g. carpenter from the silt verses), the fandom still treats them being asexual as canon. fandom treats aromanticism as something that must only exist within asexuality, not as its own separate identity.

our fellow aspecs spew aroallophobia at us in a misguided attempt at humor (i've gotten several asks from aroaces telling me i "should" be aroace), our posts are mistagged as asexual when we make it extremely clear they're just about being aromantic (and when we point out that we don't like that, we get called control freaks. true story), the aromantic tag is filled with posts just about asexuality, allos either call us emotional abusers and imply we objectify people by simply experiencing sexual attraction, or imply that we're just afraid of attachment and that they can "fix" us.

the absolutely jarring truth of being an aroallo on tumblr dot com is making a post about being aroallo and immediately getting ten anons telling me i'm "no better than a straight man", "an aroace in denial", "an emotionally abusive predator", or just a slut, while at the same time someone comments on my post "you're making up an issue that doesn't exist" "why are you so mad about this" "you wanna be a victim so bad"

whew. okii that's all. hope that clears stuff up for non-aroallos out there /gen

what they said

[aromanticofficial]

official aromantic post

listen, sometimes it's more powerful for a fictional relationship to be a friendship precisely because friendship is devalued in comparison to romance. anyone can sacrifice themself for the love of their life. but for a friend? if anything, that kind of devotion can be even more moving than if the relationship is romantic. there's a real dramatic power to prioritising friendship in your narratives sometimes.

[queer--anomaly]

ive been seeing a lot of wholesome inclusive arospec posts with the tag "queuepid was wrong"

who is queuepid?/gen

[aromanticofficial]

official aromantic post

My favorite part of Jeeves and Wooster was when Bertie said “I say, Jeeves! The very idea of marriage eludes me. After pulling a dozen lovestruck fools out of the soup, I’ve come to know that the whole thing is simply more trouble than it’s worth! If one finds oneself alone in this great world, one should be relieved to have escaped the hassles of modern matrimony. Oh join a club, lunch with a friend, I don’t know. It’s all just a bit looney, don’t you find?” And Jeeves said “Indeed, sir.” And then they gazed at each other easily and went about their day in companionable silence

[aromanticofficial]

periodic reminder that your only purpose is to live and you get to choose how you do that. you don't need to conform to backwards standards and roles. be free. be happy

[aromanticofficial]

Romance is an idea made up by Big Love to sell more chocolate

this is a conspiracy going all the way back to Saint Valentine